Too stuck to dream xx

So what happens when you feel stuck.. What do you do when "murder she wrote" at 3pm on bbc2 is the high light of your day and you dont know what to do next. What if you wake up everyday and just dont know whom you are anymore. So much has happened all at once that its not that you dont know if your coming or going.. or just going.. you feel gone.. and you dont know where to find yourself.. your favourite dress, best shoes and a day of starvation dont even remind you.. We all know that lying in bed till 11am isnt the answer but if there is no point what do you do.. and what is the point.. and where do you find it if you lose it?? These thoughts have been entering my head lots recently.. Do we reach a point in our life like a 7 year hitch where we need to look at everything again before we leap into the next adventure. I have realised that feeling uncomfortable is good and it pushes us but being stuck in it can be like wearing a itching jumper and not knowing when your be able to take it off or what you will swap it for. Its easy to look at ourselves and moan about our fat bellies we would like to swap, our legs we would like to be longer and get down about our debt and lack of ever being able to by a house or find the right man.. but what about when we have to look at our good points, when we have to sit and think about what we enjoy doing. we seem to ignore these beautiful moments on a daily basis whilst emerging ourselves under all the shit and basically it stinks and we have to stop.. I like inspiring people, i want them to know how important they are thats what makes me click, i dont care about celebrities telling me how great they are whilst the viewer feels inadequate about there own life (which by the way is actually perfectly normal it is the celebs that are messed up crazy fools most of the time.. ).. Now dont get me wrong some people just get famous because of what they do its just the way it works but the people that chase the love, that need the attention make me want to fall asleep.. we should be speaking to the nurses that saved your grandads live, the porters whom work their arses off for all of us but cant afford 3 holdays a year but are worth their weight in gold.. So for me things are changing.. I am changing.. My personal experience and my work with CALM have changed me and my work is heading in a different direction and i am going back to school i think. i am taking my passions and my strengths and i am going to develop them into my media work. Its time for the media to work for me and for us and i am starting to get a clearer picture on how i am meant to do this.. and i must be on the right track as for the first time in weeks "murder she wrote" is not the most exciting thing in my day..... xxxx