Wednesday, 23 June 2010
Tuesday, 22 June 2010
Saturday, 19 June 2010
Last night = Club Kali, Tufnell Park - people = Bollywood Chuntey Queens, My mate Fi and Simster with beards and all for Zaynins bday. Action = Bollywood dancing drag queens and pre op trannys pretending to have it off the hetro way on the dance floor. Too much fun for me.. I ache in places I didn't think possible and came back with more lube than a women should ever need in her life, stuffed in my bag coz it seemed like a good idea to take the free promotional goods whilst drinking brandy and dancing to 'Oh Shanti Om'
Friday, 18 June 2010
The Ascot Hat
Wednesday, 2 June 2010
Tuesday, 1 June 2010
A soul mates purpose is to shake you up,
A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master..."
— Elizabeth Gilbert (Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman's Search for Everything Across Italy, India and Indonesia)
This book has jumped out at me about 10 times in the last week. So I thought I would look it up and there it was a quote that hit me like a tone of bricks. This week is a week which has been a totally nightmare, well a total nightmare in my mind at least. Its been 9 months since I broke up with a soul mate and yet the last 3 weeks have been the hardest of all. So how does a girl whom has written a book about how she has sorted her life out and that is half way through her 2nd book about mending a broken heart go about sharing this pain and admitting that after all I am still only human. This weekend I cried into the arms of my friends. Like a soldier I have been battling on for so long and then it got me.. The emotion had reached its peak, there was only one way out and fu8k me did it. All it took was a friendly hug from a best friend and like Niagara falls it burst out and I cried and shook until I had no more left. Pretending that your invincible is not a truth that gives you any strength. I truly wonder if the Dali Lama kicks a door when someone has pissed him off or how long it took him to get to a place of peace so that he just doesn’t have to. For me I am still learning, we are all still learning, even the big D and I only know what I know and that it’s what I share. This week I became afraid of my emotions, I felt let down because I wanted to be a ‘expert’ it was a title that I had got caught up in somehow and I had managed to forget the beauty in my truth and my ability to be real and honest with myself. I loved and man whom was here to teach me a lesson, I needed to be broken so I could rebuild myself bigger and stronger. It hurts having these growing pains and change is hard but I will embrace it knowing that like medicine it does me good and I hope that whatever change you are having right now causes you to do the same. This blog is going to change from now on.. it’s time to get a bit more honest.. For a long time I have been honest, but underneath slightly scared.. So here it is .. me the girl whom stays out late, loves crap TV , loves dressing like a mad women but most of all wants to know how we can all live better, be better and feel better xx may me you and this blog have lots of fun xxxxxxx
— Elizabeth Gilbert (Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman's Search for Everything Across Italy, India and Indonesia)
This book has jumped out at me about 10 times in the last week. So I thought I would look it up and there it was a quote that hit me like a tone of bricks. This week is a week which has been a totally nightmare, well a total nightmare in my mind at least. Its been 9 months since I broke up with a soul mate and yet the last 3 weeks have been the hardest of all. So how does a girl whom has written a book about how she has sorted her life out and that is half way through her 2nd book about mending a broken heart go about sharing this pain and admitting that after all I am still only human. This weekend I cried into the arms of my friends. Like a soldier I have been battling on for so long and then it got me.. The emotion had reached its peak, there was only one way out and fu8k me did it. All it took was a friendly hug from a best friend and like Niagara falls it burst out and I cried and shook until I had no more left. Pretending that your invincible is not a truth that gives you any strength. I truly wonder if the Dali Lama kicks a door when someone has pissed him off or how long it took him to get to a place of peace so that he just doesn’t have to. For me I am still learning, we are all still learning, even the big D and I only know what I know and that it’s what I share. This week I became afraid of my emotions, I felt let down because I wanted to be a ‘expert’ it was a title that I had got caught up in somehow and I had managed to forget the beauty in my truth and my ability to be real and honest with myself. I loved and man whom was here to teach me a lesson, I needed to be broken so I could rebuild myself bigger and stronger. It hurts having these growing pains and change is hard but I will embrace it knowing that like medicine it does me good and I hope that whatever change you are having right now causes you to do the same. This blog is going to change from now on.. it’s time to get a bit more honest.. For a long time I have been honest, but underneath slightly scared.. So here it is .. me the girl whom stays out late, loves crap TV , loves dressing like a mad women but most of all wants to know how we can all live better, be better and feel better xx may me you and this blog have lots of fun xxxxxxx
Wednesday, 12 May 2010
So Anstey is now a red head...
Armed with peroxide.. A bottle of red (yes that’s wine not the dye) and my colour of desire I am now a new women, I am now a red head, a very bright one in fact..
You see that’s how us girls do it, when we want instant notification that we have a brand new life, new hopes and new dreams we change our hair..
As someone whom normally went to the hair dresser with high hopes and came out 90 minutes later with the latest fashion victim fringe and a dented ego I have now changed.. My hair is still long, it is still luscious but this time I did not fall victim to a over zealous hairdresser. This time.. I have super drug to blame…
Red rocks… lets do..
You see that’s how us girls do it, when we want instant notification that we have a brand new life, new hopes and new dreams we change our hair..
As someone whom normally went to the hair dresser with high hopes and came out 90 minutes later with the latest fashion victim fringe and a dented ego I have now changed.. My hair is still long, it is still luscious but this time I did not fall victim to a over zealous hairdresser. This time.. I have super drug to blame…
Red rocks… lets do..
Thursday, 29 April 2010
Monday, 1 March 2010
Why do all the good men go? It is time to say the S word
Today I relived all the emotional pain of my past. Today another man I loved decided that his fear of life was more intimating than death.
I didn't know Alexander McQueen but I loved his creations and dreamt that with my success I would buy one of his originals. Now it is unlikely that is going to happen.
I am frustrated. I know I cannot control another’s actions, I know I cannot take away their pain but I want to have the ability to show them how wonderful they are even if they don't feel it. Every single one of us is important and although we can feel overwhelmed by the days ahead of us none of us should deny ourselves the love and opportunity that is around the corner.
Suicide in men is an epidemic. But you are choosing to hide and hope that if you ignore it will go away.
Men I know we have confused you. One minute we want you macho the next we are demanding you cry. Sometimes I worry that it’s our fault but then I have told you how much I love you and I thought you listened.
To know that someone can feel so sad inside is a overwhelming moment for many. We have lost someone so talented, an icon, an inspiration. For me I was brought to tears.
But you see 3 young men’s family’s a day are feel exactly the same about their son, their boyfriend, husband and best friend.
The suicide epidemic is real and the work I do for the Campaign Against Living Miserably is real but we are being ignored
Many corporate and governmental organizations’ are scared to say the S word. It has a stigma that creates concern. We miss out on grants, fundraisers and media coverage because you people with power are scared.
Let me ask you this how scared must of Alexander McQueen been of his life to do what he did.
It is now time to stop this nonsense. If we don't join forces and get together we will all know 4 people that take their own life.
This week we lost the man that made our dresses 5 years ago I lost the man that gave me cuddles. Where will this stop?
Join the fight for living
Save the male @ http://www.calm500100.co.uk/film.php
I didn't know Alexander McQueen but I loved his creations and dreamt that with my success I would buy one of his originals. Now it is unlikely that is going to happen.
I am frustrated. I know I cannot control another’s actions, I know I cannot take away their pain but I want to have the ability to show them how wonderful they are even if they don't feel it. Every single one of us is important and although we can feel overwhelmed by the days ahead of us none of us should deny ourselves the love and opportunity that is around the corner.
Suicide in men is an epidemic. But you are choosing to hide and hope that if you ignore it will go away.
Men I know we have confused you. One minute we want you macho the next we are demanding you cry. Sometimes I worry that it’s our fault but then I have told you how much I love you and I thought you listened.
To know that someone can feel so sad inside is a overwhelming moment for many. We have lost someone so talented, an icon, an inspiration. For me I was brought to tears.
But you see 3 young men’s family’s a day are feel exactly the same about their son, their boyfriend, husband and best friend.
The suicide epidemic is real and the work I do for the Campaign Against Living Miserably is real but we are being ignored
Many corporate and governmental organizations’ are scared to say the S word. It has a stigma that creates concern. We miss out on grants, fundraisers and media coverage because you people with power are scared.
Let me ask you this how scared must of Alexander McQueen been of his life to do what he did.
It is now time to stop this nonsense. If we don't join forces and get together we will all know 4 people that take their own life.
This week we lost the man that made our dresses 5 years ago I lost the man that gave me cuddles. Where will this stop?
Join the fight for living
Save the male @ http://www.calm500100.co.uk/film.php
Friday, 27 November 2009
South London's Heroes Awards
A STAR-studded gala to honour the fantastic achievements of South Londoners went off with a bang on Tuesday night and I was there giving a award.
Our Heroes 2009 was extra special as it was the 10th anniversary of the awards, which have brought incredible stories of courage, bravery and loyalty to the public eye.
I was so overwelmed, more to come when I get the photos xx
Anstey
Our Heroes 2009 was extra special as it was the 10th anniversary of the awards, which have brought incredible stories of courage, bravery and loyalty to the public eye.
I was so overwelmed, more to come when I get the photos xx
Anstey
Saturday, 7 November 2009
I am breaking a world record..
There are certain things that you should do at least once in your life, jump out of a plane, run a marathon, feed sharks, swim with dolphins and now you have the chance to break a world record.
November 12 is Guinness World Records and if you haven’t got your attempt organized We would like to invite you to be a world record breaker with CALM
This is the time of year I seem to review all the achievements I have made in my life, I have graduated from the school of hard knocks, seen Mount Everest and now I am set to be a record breaker. How's that for a claim to fame. Fabulous and I can’t wait to host the attempt when it happens live in 2010.
Come and join me.. All you need to do id]s donate £100 quid for your T shirt and you are in, hassle free and stress free with all the benefits of being able to boast to your mates. Use your noodle and get some fundraising happening your end to get yourself that £100. Get 10 mates to put in £10 put all 10 faces on your t shirt that calm will even create and make for you and off you go.. genius.
heres some stuff calm made for you.. enjoy
BREAKING A WORLD RECORD
To raise money for CALM's pioneering text and web-chat services, we're attempting to break the world record for the greatest number of t-shirts worn at once and you can help us and be part of it. Our goal is to get 500 logos on 500 t-shirts worn by two young blokes. Getting involved is easy (just click on the donate button) and you'll be helping to both break a record and save someone's life.
We have bravely volunteered to attempt to break the world record for t-shirt wearing. They’re each aiming to get 250 t-shirts on in one go to raise £50,000 for CALM. To raise this sum we’re asking 500 companies and individuals to donate £100 and get their logo on one of the t-shirts worn on the big day. The money raised will go towards funding a much-needed text and web-chat service.
ABOUT CALM
An average of 3 young men commit suicide every day in Britain. CALM, the Campaign Against Living Miserably, is a unique charity that supports them when they’re in crisis. With your help we can save and improve the lives of even more young men in the UK.
Making the donation is a piece of cake, it takes just a couple of clicks once you hit the secure on-line donate button below. You needn't be a company or group either, individuals can also donate and upload an image or message to go on one of the t-shirts. All donations automatically go via Paypal. If you'd like to arrange an alternative method of payment, simply email info@thecalmzone.net
WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?
Once your donation is through, we'll e-mail you a link to upload your logo, photo or message. You send the image back to us and hey-presto!, it will appear on one of the world record setting t-shirts, for all to see. You will be a record breaker in 2010. So come on, get involved. Not only will you be setting a world record you'll be making a real difference to thousands of young British lives. Many, many thanks (100 in fact).
Stephen Merchant and David Baddiel are breaking the world record with us too and you can see them at http://www.calm500100.co.uk/film.php
www.calm500100.co.uk
November 12 is Guinness World Records and if you haven’t got your attempt organized We would like to invite you to be a world record breaker with CALM
This is the time of year I seem to review all the achievements I have made in my life, I have graduated from the school of hard knocks, seen Mount Everest and now I am set to be a record breaker. How's that for a claim to fame. Fabulous and I can’t wait to host the attempt when it happens live in 2010.
Come and join me.. All you need to do id]s donate £100 quid for your T shirt and you are in, hassle free and stress free with all the benefits of being able to boast to your mates. Use your noodle and get some fundraising happening your end to get yourself that £100. Get 10 mates to put in £10 put all 10 faces on your t shirt that calm will even create and make for you and off you go.. genius.
heres some stuff calm made for you.. enjoy
BREAKING A WORLD RECORD
To raise money for CALM's pioneering text and web-chat services, we're attempting to break the world record for the greatest number of t-shirts worn at once and you can help us and be part of it. Our goal is to get 500 logos on 500 t-shirts worn by two young blokes. Getting involved is easy (just click on the donate button) and you'll be helping to both break a record and save someone's life.
We have bravely volunteered to attempt to break the world record for t-shirt wearing. They’re each aiming to get 250 t-shirts on in one go to raise £50,000 for CALM. To raise this sum we’re asking 500 companies and individuals to donate £100 and get their logo on one of the t-shirts worn on the big day. The money raised will go towards funding a much-needed text and web-chat service.
ABOUT CALM
An average of 3 young men commit suicide every day in Britain. CALM, the Campaign Against Living Miserably, is a unique charity that supports them when they’re in crisis. With your help we can save and improve the lives of even more young men in the UK.
Making the donation is a piece of cake, it takes just a couple of clicks once you hit the secure on-line donate button below. You needn't be a company or group either, individuals can also donate and upload an image or message to go on one of the t-shirts. All donations automatically go via Paypal. If you'd like to arrange an alternative method of payment, simply email info@thecalmzone.net
WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?
Once your donation is through, we'll e-mail you a link to upload your logo, photo or message. You send the image back to us and hey-presto!, it will appear on one of the world record setting t-shirts, for all to see. You will be a record breaker in 2010. So come on, get involved. Not only will you be setting a world record you'll be making a real difference to thousands of young British lives. Many, many thanks (100 in fact).
Stephen Merchant and David Baddiel are breaking the world record with us too and you can see them at http://www.calm500100.co.uk/film.php
www.calm500100.co.uk
Thursday, 22 October 2009
Sort out your crap life
Been laying low finishing my first book “Toilet Training, sort out your crap life” and I am so excited about it. I have worked so hard on sorting out my own life that I wanted to share my insight and wisdom with the nation. Didn’t quite expect to put it all to test with a broken heart whilst writing it but at least I know it all still bloody works. Breaking up with my fella has been tough but when the going gets tough the tough get going and wow am I going.. it is all happening and I promise to keep you informed but right now I am off to look at the books first graphic designs.
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